Lesson Learned

If I were a better writer, this space would be filled with a 2,000 word treatise on “what getting my ass fired taught me.” I would have gotten a book deal out of it with my witty prose and would be called “The Next Jen Lancaster!” Jen would write one of those quotes for my book jacket and she would invite me to her next 80’s party.

What I would actually had written would read more like one of those forced August “What I Did Last Summer” essays full of clichés and generalizations about how picking up trash in the city park made me realize what a great country we live in. Or in my case – loading and unloading the dishwasher because there was nothing other than soap operas and A Baby Story on TV made me realize what a soul crushing existence I would have if I stayed at home.

All that said, I have to have learned SOMETHING during my brief furlough from the corporate grind right?

I enjoyed doing freelance CPA work. I enjoyed it a lot. I set up my desk on the bar in the kitchen and went to town. I bought office supplies and stapled and added and paper clipped to my heart’s content. I did some great, fun work in my pajamas. (Y’all can laugh all you want, but it was fun.)

My kids are the best, most fantastic and SICKLY children on the planet. Dear Jesus, they had pneumonia, MRSA, colds, ear infections, and diaper rash. If I thought that staying home while the kids went to daycare would be relaxing and regenerative, I was rudely awakened during week two when Hudson’s leg turned into a giant summer sausage like appendage because of his tetanus shot induced MRSA. I loved every minute home with them, even if they were sick. And grouchy. And crying a lot. Well, I mostly enjoyed it. Everything except the vomit. (Maddie's sleep regression was particularly harrowing. I thought it was to get her little brain ready for full on crawling, but apparently it was to get her ready to PULL UP ON FURNITURE. Which she is doing now with great gusto and disregard for her personal safety.)

Picking a daycare that is close to where you work is probably not the brightest plan ever. Because when you get fired, that 40 minute commute you had with 5 minutes to work becomes a 3 hour trek to trade cars with your husband and drive the million miles to the place and then take all the kids home. You have to go early too. Because what’s the point of picking them up at the same time you did while you were at work and still hitting all the traffic? You’ve got to get them early so the daycare people don’t think you’re a lazy beeyotch who is sitting at home doing nothing. And then you get rear-ended.

My husband is the most patient and forgiving person on the planet. He never got upset with me about getting fired. He was madder at my old employer then anything. He didn’t tell me not to leave the house with my wallet. He didn’t keep me from having lunch with my friends. He watched both of our children while I went to Nan’s and helped her for tax season to make us some extra money. He nearly went through the roof when the job drama of a few weeks ago unfolded, threatening to call the recruiter himself. He took the kids to daycare everyday and picked them up a couple of times a week, even when he really didn’t want to. He asked me if I was depressed about losing my job, and why when he came home I was sitting with the TV on and one lamp on in the whole house. (I was saving electricity.) He does more for me than I deserve. And he handles the money, so he’s the one who made sure we still had DirecTV and groceries.

I got back to reading. I got back to cooking. Unfortunately I didn’t get back to Hudson’s Christmas stocking. But I did learn how to consign stuff and make some money. And how to file for unemployment – a skill I never hope to have to use again. I got back to commenting on everyone's blog instead of hiding out in the feed reader. (I should probably apologize for that.)

For so many years, my job was who I was. I was an accountant. That term was intertwined with my very being. I made sure I pleased my job before anyone else. I got paid well for putting work first. But when someone calls you into a conference room and tells you that who you are isn’t good enough for their business, or someone tells you that your skills are lacking because of your public accounting experience - it calls not just your job but your identity into question. And that takes some getting used to.

Maybe I’m not that person anymore. Maybe I’m ready to put myself and my family first. I think my new job WANTS me to do that. That’s just fine with me. I think I’m ready to spend more time in the backyard rather than chained to my desk.

Comments

[Shannanb]

Congrats on the new job and congrats on all the family time you've had. It's always hard to balance family and work and it seems like you've got it figured out.

[Kellie]

Love this post. Congrats on the new job and making it all work :)

[Angela]

I am not my job anymore either. I think that is the heart of my issues with this job. Beautiful post!

[SJ]

I've always had a hard time finding the balance between work and home life. I'm so glad you were able to find yourself during this rough time!

You've got the whole world in your hands now!!

[Claire]

Congrats girl. You and I are kind of on the same path these days. Though I did not get fired, I am changing jobs and I find I have the same feelings. Not wanting to work all the time. Now, my first priority, if I work, is for my kids to enjoy their days at the daycare center. and I work inbetween that. It used to be that I worked, and just picked up the kids whenever. Now it is different. I found that I am able to say my kids are absolutely most important and the job must come 2nd and everyone must understand! Glad you are settling in with the new job.

Still in public acctg?